Finding the Bean
by vLushCookiee
Summary: Sasuke Uchiha never thought that once in his life he had to take responsibiliy of his pink-haired teammate. His BABY teammate. This is all HER fault! Not knowing when or how Sakura will turn back to normal, he has no choice but to...babysit.
1. You can't be serious

My first. C; About 6 other chapters are done, but I'm lazy. ^0^ Nuff said, Grenadez.

SasuSaku

Rated - M for language and/or later sexual themes

`MeBreezyiSwagg Presents!` ;D

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What was he going to do? What was he going to do with a BABY? He looked at the little infant with the most confused what-the-fuck expression he did in his life. There it was, in a pink, girly basket covered in a ring of flowers; something she would have if she had a baby. It surrounded the child, with lace edges to only add more of a background to the beautiful child. The baby's head was barely covered with light pink hair in the look of a newborn, but small, short and high ponytails that looked like a 'c'. She didn't have her regular bangs yet, as the hair was slightly curled on her forehead. It had big green pretty eyes with soft long lashes. Its nose was small and plump and soft by just looking at it. Its face was also plump and chubby, its mouth covered with saliva, drooling down its face with fingers from one hand and the whole knuckle from the other, teething. Its dress was a darker pink than her hair and looked like a tutu but with just one layer. The dress was short-sleeved and scrunched at the end. Its pure white diaper was visible with the short dress, it looked like an angel. Sasuke, wearing a pitch black jacket with the zipper undone a bit leaving his collar bone exposed and as bottoms, he wore black capris with his ninja shoes, peering down at his infant teammate. Why the hell did she do that? Fucking why?

~*Flashback*~ **"Sasuke-kun, I think we should apologize." The Blossom of the Leaf said worriedly to her frienemy after eyeing the unconscious body before them. He didn't bother looking away from the smoked guy on the earth floor to look at her. The half dead guy happened to be Lee, the Handsome Devil of the Leaf. Lee and Sasuke have been enemies since Lee's goal is to marry Sakura and claim her for the rest of his life. Something inside of the Uchiha irked him thoroughly, and something else inside of him stated, without even thinking, that Sakura was already his (in which she squealed and blushed in glee) and to 'go stick your brows in someone else's ass'. But Lee wanted to challenge Sasuke to the death for the girl, in which the sly boy smirked evilly, but it disappeared when he said hand-on-hand combat. Sasuke wanted to BURN him. DESTROY him. Use every jutsu he knew to REND HIM BEYOND REPAIR. The battle was almost an hour as Sakura just watched the two in amazement, mainly her frienemy. She watched as he skillfully moved, his signature smirk never leaving his to-die-for face. Lee's expression was very determined, not holding back, the power of love burning within him. "For Sakura!" Lee exclaimed as he zoomed a fist towards the other boy (A/N Lol 'For Narniaaaa!' xD). "Tsk. 'For Sakura' my ass." Sasuke mumbled. He gracefully dodged, grabbed the wrist Lee threw his fist with and his elbow and threw The Devil with pure strength behind him. "You are quite strong, but my love for Miss Sakura Haruno is stronger!" He declared, forming back at his regular stance; his arm a ninety degree angle behind his back and his other arm reached towards the other boy halfway as his hand's fingers are all together and thumb slightly bent. The Uchiha narrowed his eyes. "You're a fuckin' pain, you know that? So annoying." Sasuke positioned himself to dash towards the dork before he heard, "Hey! That line is reserved for me, remember Sasuke-kun?" from a distance. He looked in the direction where he heard the faint yell and raised a brow. "I'm the annoying one, 'member?" He heard again. His face formed a small smirk, listening to the idiot girl and looked back at his target. He then appeared behind Lee, which he caught instantly and spun around, and started to fight again. Sasuke dodged and attacked, just as Lee did, his Sharingan never activated. Since they both have a pretty great stamina, Sasuke got impatient and bored. Knowing his bad-boy-I-don't-give-a-shit attitude, he broke the standard and used his Phoenix Flower Jutsu on Lee which now leaves the two in their current situation. He lay there, smoked. "Sasuke-kun, you both agreed that ya'll won't use your jutsus! Walk up to him and apologize…" Sakura pressed, frowing after she ran up to her teammate.**

"**No." Sasuke's gaze still didn't leave The Devil as he replied emotionlessly.**

"**Sasuke-kun…" At this, he looked at her. Her voice wasn't sweet or worried; it was deep, monstrous and exorcist-like. He didn't even see her. He saw the actual Devil, glaring with fire in its eyes with her outfit on. What the hell… He sweat-dropped. Obviously, she doesn't like the idea of someone doing something they shouldn't have and then not apologizing.**

"**It got boring." He finally answered to her , turning his head and eyes back to the guy on the ground. "It's not like he would hear me anyway." They stood, studying unconscious Lee like two children seeing the first dead body of their lives. Sakura kept her frown.**

"**Do it."**

"**Do what?"**

"**Apologize."**

"**No."**

"**Do it, you butt!" She raised her voice.**

"**NO." He raised his also.**

…

"**If you don't, then I'll turn into a rat."**

**He looked at her and inclined a brow. She was back to normal, thank goodness. "You'll what?"**

"**Turn into a rat!"**

"**Hn. Do what you want. I'm not apologizing." He said, turning away from her only receiving a growl. Right afterwards, a flash of light suddenly erupted from behind him. It shined brightly, surrounding their surroundings.**

"**What the-" He lifted his forearm to his eyes to block the blinding light. As it slowly faded, he looked around to spot the girl. He saw nothing, just the previous setting he was in before. He looked at the ground to see if Lee was still there, which he was, his body sprawled out lifelessly.**

**Then, he heard a short giggle. Not just any giggle, not an adult giggle, not a teenage giggle, not a kid's little giggle, but an infant's giggle. Not behind, beside, but right in front of him. Below him. **End Flashback. Sasuke watched the baby child kick its feet a little. She calls this a rat? What the hell should he do?


	2. Critical Hit'

"What the _fuck!_ Using the same damn move over and over again! What's up? That's the only way you can win?"

"Haha! What's wrong, dickless? Gonna _cry_?"

"This dickless guy is gonna shove it right up your ass." a male voice impersonating a homosexual.

"Fag- Oh, what the fuck!"

'Critical Hit!' the video game exclaimed. 'Knock Out!'

"Yeah bitch, check me out!" Naruto threw his controller at the television as it toppled on the floor while he shot up from sitting indian-style to stand up, put his hands behind his head, bucking his hips front and back. "Suck it!"

"Such bull!" Kiba snarled through clenched teeth. He was also sitting indian-style but one knee propped up. Naruto stopped his victory dance and picked up the controller.

"Heh. You mad bro?" He cooed while flicking his shirt up and down with his finger showing off his abs.

"Pff. Please. Your big ass head was all up in the TV. I could barely see!" Kiba claimed.

"I'll give you head." His homosexual impersonation came back as he bit his index finger naughtily.

"Mmm, bring that over here!" the other boy licked his lips, pretending to be a rapist.

"Gay jerks…" his little sister Nina mumbled. She had been watching the two play Street Fighter, yelling and complaining at one another. She just wore an oversized brown t-shirt with socks. Her hair was brown, messy and boy-like, but she had a bit more than Kiba. Nina had just turned 10. She was standing with her arms crossed over her chest behind the two. Naruto was wearing a plain white-t with baggy black shorts that was right below the knee. Kiba wore a dark grey beater and his regular ninja pants, barefoot. They were like brothers; both insane and loud, being jackasses. They just had too much time on their hands. They decided that if whoever loses 10 rounds in Street Fighter gets to sleep outside at Mrs. Inuzuki's house. They're as just as good as each other so guessing who would win is like flipping a coin. "Sometimes I wonder if you two aren't kidding."

Naruto looked at the girl. "I _have_ a girlfriend, kid." He leaned to the floor a bit, tossing the controller on the floor not being too careless about it.

"That doesn't mean anything." She said simply. The boys hated her. She would always say something smart out of that little ignorant mouth or ruin the fun, in which she killed the fun atmosphere. "It could be a disguise to hide the fact that you're gay."

Kiba, already tired of her voice and presence, butt in. He stood up, turned to her while scratching his head with an annoyed expression.

"Shut up, brat. You're always sayin' smart shit out of your mouth. I can't wait 'til your little girlfriends turn on your ass and be like-" Kiba voices like a little girl, "'I'm tired of this bitch. Let's bank her girls. Woohoo!'"- Naruto started to burst out laughing at his 'bro's impersonation."- and beat you to a fuckin' pulp." Naruto's laugh died down to a chuckle. Kiba started to laugh too. "Then one of 'em is gonna throw a punch 'n all you're gonna do is whine like a lil' punk! Hahaha they'd be like,-" He voices and acts like a little girl again as he puts his hands on his hips and sways his head sassily."-'Yeah bitch ain't gonna fight back?'" Both boys laughed. Nina wrinkled her nose and pouted, putting her hands on her hips and replied like the little snobby brat she is.

"Whatever, losers!" she shot. "I could fight them just like I could fight you!"

"Pff."

She then sung a line from Blood on the Dance Floor. "You can talk your shit, you're only makin' me famous!"

"Watch your mouth, lil girl. I'mma tell mom."

"I'mma tell mom you're gay!"

"Go ahead. I don't care. She already knows that I'm not. I get ass." The single boy smirked. She just gave a 'hmph!' stomped her foot and stomped off. Before she was gone completely, Kiba grabbed the first thing he saw which happened to be a vase with flowers in it. "Heads up!" and chucked it at her head. Bull's-eye. Nina fell dramatically from the impact, the vase shattered in the air as it hit her, the eight flowers sprawled away from each other. Naruto has never laughed so hard in the last week. His arms wrapped around his stomach, howling of laughter, but released one arm to hold himself up on the wall from falling over. Tears came from his eyes and he was now panting.

"Dude…" the blonde said between pants. "Isn't your…your mom gonna g-get crazy mad when… she notices t-the vase h-i-i-s broken?" Kiba was busy laughing too; until Nina was now standing. Her face was _red_. Dangerously red. Not from embarassment, but she. Was. FURIOUS. Her face and hands were balled up. The boys' laughter finally died down into a sigh. They looked at the about-to-blow girl. She was twitching; her bottom lids, her mouth, her head. "Woah… Are you ok Nina?" And then, she screamed. Oh so loudly to the top of her lungs. The noise was insane. Naruto placed his hands over his ears as he squeezed one eye shut. "Dude, make her stop!" Kiba was unaffected. He just stood there, with another annoyed look on his face as if this happens very often which it did; throwing merchandise, fighting, and screaming at each other. Not just the siblings either. Mr. and Mrs. Inuzuki do it to. Sometimes the family altogether gets into one big fight.

"Hey, Nina." He tried to call over her crazy screaming. "Shut up. It's not like you don't get me back. You get me all the damn time. Stop being a wimp." She stopped, and put her hands on her hips.

"You're right, mutt." Nina's voice and attitude was back to normal. She walked passed her brother and Naruto and stood beside the flat screen television. Her hand was placed on the corner closest to her. She stared devilishly at Kiba as he knew exactly what she was thinking.

"Don't you dare do that shit, Nina. I'm fuckin' warning you." He snarled. "Actually, no. Go ahead. I dare your bratty ass. _Do it_."

"C'mon Nina, you don't gotta do that. Don't be a pain." Naruto also annoyed said.

Kiba turned his head towards the lead way out of the living room when he heard a couple of knocks at the door. Mrs. Inuzuki yelled downstairs, "Get that for me, Kiba."

"Yeah. Got it." he yelled back. He dropped his controller and headed to the front door while Naruto was nosy enough to peek after him. Once he opened it, he saw the Uchiha. "Heyyy, Wassup, Uchiha? Rare that you'd come here." he lazily greeted his friend. Naruto slid across the smooth surface with his white socks to end beside Kiba.

"Sasuke-teme!" he said enthusiastically to his best friend. "What's up?" Kiba noticed the girly-flowered basket in his right hand while his other was in his black jacket pocket. He was frowning. Nina ran down the hallway almost falling again as soon as she heard 'Sasuke' (in which her brother would have laughed) and saw her crush, or 'true love forever and ever and if you don't like it then I'll slit your damn throat' gasping. "Oh my gosh, Sasuke Uchihaaaa!" she squealed like a fan slapping her palms to her cheeks. Naruto and Kiba, attention still on the basket asked, "What's that?"

Sasuke greeted the two, ignoring the sister. "Hey." He then looked at Naruto with a serious look. "We gotta talk."

"Huh?" Naruto asked cluelessly. Nina was still in the background repeating 'Omgomgomgomg'. Sasuke raised the arm the pretty basket was in.

"About this."

"What is it?" In a flash, Nina snatched the basket out of the boy's hand. Sasuke widened his eyes.

"Oh my gosh, are these for me?" She said loudly, her attention on the pretty flowers. Sasuke didn't move. He just stood there, very cautious, his eyes on the endangered basket, frowning slightly hoping that Sakura is not about to cry. Kiba, noticing his face, snatched the basket out of his sister's hands.

"Damn it Nina. Mind your own fuckin' business! Go read a book or something!" He said as he grabbed the back of her shirt and slung her to the glass bookcase on the other side of the room, impacting it hard with crashing sounds echoing the room. Naruto sweat-dropped. He turned to Sasuke and handed the basket back to him. "Here you go, man."

"Thanks." He replied, looking at the Sakura through the sheets hoping she's ok. He looked at Naruto. "Let's go."

"What's up?"

"Just come on."

Kiba turned to walk to the kitchen to get a snack. "Well, you guys go ahead and settle your stuff. I'mma go chill."

"Alright man, see ya." Naruto called out to his 'bro's back as he headed to the kitchen. He threw on his scarlet jacket that was hanging on the coat rack over his white t-shirt, slid in his ninja shoes and closed the door behind him with Sasuke. He opened the door again. "Bye Mrs. Inuzuki!" he called and closing the door again not caring for her response. All he and Sasuke heard was more things breaking and yelling.


	3. Skittles

~`Have ya'll seen Avengers? C; Cool, ain't it? My buddy Zaynah and I luuuuuhhh Loki :D He's such a creeper! His ass got owned by the Hulk, though. xD Lololol Loki, Thor, Iron Man ( Robert Downey Jr! Is my husband. ;B), and Captain America were all awesome :D

AHEEEEEM Whatevs. On with my Fic. ^0^

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As the two guys walked to their conversation-holding atmosphere, the Training Field, Sasuke stopped and turned to his best friend, not meeting his blue eyes as his midnight ones were closed.

"So what's up?" the blonde broke the silence, studying Sasuke's emotionless expression. He finally met his gaze, but still silent for a short while. He held up the basket with one hand and removed the white blanket covering her. Naruto's face went from curious, to blank, to what-the-fuck? "Is…that…?" he stared at the infant. It stared back at him with its big green eyes.

"Yes, it is." Sasuke said boldy, intensely staring at him. Naruto jumped back and pointed at the teme.

"You made Sakura-chan have a baby! Your raging hormones couldn't wait _a bit_! What the hell, man! You're fuckin' insane! Pervert! I'm gonna kill you!" he burst.

"Wha-…_What_?" Sasuke stressed, his expression copying Naruto's. Was he really that dumb? "No, you damn retard! She _is_ the baby!" He pointed at the girl.

"…_Huh_? How the he-"

"She fuckin' turned into a baby. That's 'huh'." The dobe looked from his best friend to his infant cousin, back to Sasuke and back to the baby. "Has she done this before?"

"No… What happened?"

"I got in a fight with Lee, used a jutsu when I shouldn't have, and didn't apologize." An annoyed look took over his face remembering the scenario. "She got mad and turned into this." Naruto looked at his cousin once again and stared.

"Can I hold her?" he asked as if he was a kid talking to a mom. Sasuke looked at him with an even more annoyed look.

"It's your damn cousin, go ahead." Silence. "Well?"

"Eh… I've never held baby before." He placed his hand behind his head and laughed nervously.

"Pick her up."

"…I don't want to…"

"You just said you wanted to."

"Did not!"

"But you want to."

"I know, but-"

"Stop being a girl and pick her up already." Well, that would make him the first to pick her up in this form. Sasuke looked away at his selfish thought. Should that even matter? As the dobe reached his hands to her, Sasuke moved the basket away from him. "Hold on." He set the basket down on the earth, hesitating. Naruto raised a brow at why he set it down, then smiled showing off his white teeth.

"Haha, you wanna hold her first, don't you? Greedy Uchiha!" He seemed to have read his mind without even knowing it while pointing again with both hands. "Greeeeeeedyyyy." Sasuke continued to study her.

"I haven't even held one before." he mumbled. As he crouched down, he slowly- ever so slowly- placed his hands on both sides of her firmly, but carefully to raise her. Her big eyes watched him- no, his jacket's collar bone's string, dangling in her face, her knuckle still in her mouth while the other hand in a fist as she met his eye level. "I feel so awkward." He sweat-dropped.

"Haha! I wanna see!" Sasuke handed the baby to the eager and excited Naruto. She stared at Naruto the same way she did Sasuke. He laughed. "She's so cute! So, uh, who's gonna take care of her?" Holy crap. Sasuke was hoping the dobe's ant-sized brain didn't think of that. That was the one question he was uncertain and concerned about. He didn't want to give her to Tsunade, the _rightful mother_. Nor did he want to give it to any of her girl or guy friends. No, not her cousin. He, himself, didn't want to take responsibility of feeding, clothing, bathing, and changing her. But the thought of giving Sakura away so someone else can take care of her, his other thought objected instantly, which annoyed him. He looked at her, thinking of all this. So he replied, "I will." Naruto's face laid a shocked expression, but died down into a smile.

"Of _course_ you would! What about _changing_ her?" he asked slyly. "It would only be _weird_ if you had to change her and see her _vaginaaaa_!" He cooed, saying the last word exaggeratingly and loudly while leaning in his face reaching out his arms to put her belly in Sasuke's face. He turned his head away from the baby-lotion-smelling girl as her belly invaded all of his right face. "_Vaginaaaa_!"

"Idiot."

"Well, it would be freaky if you tried anything on her. I mean, she's just a baby right now." He got his cousin out of his best friend's face and held his arms back. His tone became very serious. "I'd kill you if you ever try." He glared.

"Tsk. Why would I?"

Naruto's tone went back to his playful, outgoing one. "Though I know that you won't-" Sakura started to cry. "Ah, see! She just thought about it and now she's crying!" The cry got louder. Both of her hands were in fists, her eyes closed shut tears and eye brows trying to meet. "Uh, what's wrong, cuzzo?" he asked worriedly, clueless on how to make her feel better. Sasuke studied her, also clueless. "Here, you take her!"

Sasuke gave him the hell-no look and said, "What the hell am _I_ supposed to do with her?"

"Sing!" The blonde joked.

"Don't play with me."

"I was kidding, teme, haha." He held his crying infant cousin to the teme. "Maybe she's hungry?"

"The fuck do I look like? Do I look like I could produce milk, asshole?" He was so annoyed at this point, her loud screaming voice over theirs was now giving him a headache. Knowing Naruto's perverted mind, all he heard was 'She can't drink sperm!'

"I'm saying, teme, is that you can buy some milk or something! Do babies eat Skittles?"

"I think. I dunno- Why the hell are you still asking me this shit?" He took his crying teammate from the laughing dobe's hands. He hesitated, debating if he should hold her to his chest and bounce her lightly while patting her back or not. Hell no, he'd look like a _real_ mom. But he can't walk through the village holding a crying baby in a basket and expect for her to stop. What would he look like? He has no choice… He slowly pulled her to his chest, one of his arms supporting her butt and his hand on her back, holding his teammate tightly. Suddenly, she stopped crying and giggled a short giggle, 'Heehee.' Silence.

"Haha, awwww, she likes you!" No shit. Her stupid childhood crush hasn't subsided one bit. "I guess she just wanted to be in teme's arms! Cute! Ah, but it's cold how she didn't want her cuzzo to hold her." Naruto shot a disappointed look. Sasuke was surprised at her sudden change of mood, yet felt a huge burst of pride. He smirked at her.

"Hn." he said, breathing in her sweet scent, easing him and his state of mind. And then, she cried all over again. And ruined the moment. "What the- Hey, quit it." He sweat-dropped as the baby's hands grabbed handfuls of his hair, tugging; one of them on the side of his head while the other was in the back. She squealed angrily.

"My _god_! Do babies PMS or something?"

"Hey, dobe."

"Yeah?"

"I'll go ahead- Ow- and take her to my place- What the hell are you doing?" She was now kicking him, her body now tilting towards his left shoulder, one hand still clenching his raven locks and her other hand gripping his shoulder; one of her leg's knees on his other shoulder while her other leg dangling. She stopped moving and giggled creating another silence and Naruto laughed.

"Geez, I wonder what she's acting so crazy for!" He said putting his hands in his jacket's pockets. By this time, Sasuke didn't need his arms anymore so he did the same as she climbed onto his head and said, 'Heeeee…' in glee, beaming her bottom two-toothed smile looking at their surroundings. "Awwwww! Sakura-chan is so adorable! Kiss her!"

"No." He replied monotonously. Though a tiny part of him would want to. Wait, what? He mentally smacked himself. No, he does not, would not, should not, could not, kiss her. All because she was just a simple teammate he knew for 4 years straight. Nothing more.

"I know you will anyway…So you're gonna go home?"

"Yeah." And with that said, Sasuke turned his back on the blonde that was saying, "Alright, later!" He headed back to the Leaf Village abandoning the pretty basket (Naruto probably did too), the wondering baby exploring his physique.


	4. Suke!

The raven-haired teen finally made his way through the village to his home from receiving all the weird stares in the world. He brushed it off ignoring questions. He saw Temari and Tenten along the way. As he stopped walking with Sakura's belly on his head, her diaper facing the girls (she was busy playing with his hood), her little frilly pink skirt falling a bit on his face, as he waited for the girls standing a foot away from him side-by-side to bombard him with questions though we know he hates them; questions, that is. Tenten and Temari's face stared at the baby on his head. They didn't see the awfully familiar pink hair yet. Leaf village residents walked by, also staring.

"Uh, hey Sasuke…Who's…baby is that?" Tenten looked, very curious.

"Not mine, if that's what you're thinking." He replied boredly. Well, she was his responsibility.

"I know, it's just… Weird to see you with a baby." She laughed. "What's her name?"

He hesitated. Should he tell them? No. No way. They weren't taking her from him. Especially with Temari around.

"… I found her."

"You found her? Where?" Think.

"In the trash can." That's the best he could do? He kicked himself mentally.

"…What were you doing in the trash can?" Silence. Damn it, will you leave him the hell _alone_? Think.

"Looking for a coin." What the hell, really? A coin? That's still the best he could do? He kicked himself again for a back-up reason. "It was Lady Tsunade's." Better.

"Aww, poor thing." She gave a worried look. "Can I look at her?"

NO! Shit… think. He decided to use one of his retreat-from-the-conversation techniques. He rummaged through his head. He couldn't pick between, 'I gotta go.' or 'It's Itachi's'. Uh…

"Itachi's gotta go." Fuck!

"…What?"

"I gotta go." He quickly turned his head away slightly at his flaw making sure the baby's head wasn't visible to them, sweat-dropping. He did terrible. Temari, noticing the difficult time he was going through, narrowed her eyes at the Uchiha. Something was fishy. And not the stinky crab meat she was holding from her brunch with Tenten. Sasuke reached behind him to grab the hood Sakura was playing with and covered her small head, starting to take a step to his left, luckily finding an ally until he was stopped by Temari.

"Then is it your baby?" Temari tried, her voice normal but mean whenever talking to the only guy she hates. "Why are you acting so suspicious?" she pushed, searching for a more difficult moment for him. Sasuke glared at her. She's looking for an answer; an explanation and she's sure as hell not getting one.

"Why do you care?"

"Sakura would be curious, too."

"I know that. I couldn't care less. It-" The air automatically smelt like poo. He sniffed once, twice, then his face formed a sour expression; like he was constipating, realizing it was the giggling baby on his head. She pooted. _You fuckin' stink! _he thought. He swallowed, continuing his sentence. "- looks a lot like her. She may be related to it." Alright, that was good.

"Can we see it?"

"No."

"Why not, Sasuke?"

"Because I don't want you to." Temari narrowed her eyes more. He smirked.

"You and I know damn well that baby didn't come from the trash can. Your raging hormone ass probably got some girl pregnant. What a dog. You'd be a disgrace to your clan." She said slyly, knowing she pissed him off by this comment. He just narrowed his eyes too as they gave a menacing warning in his midnight eyes and clenched his teeth angrily at her. How dare she. Fuck her. Fuck trying to be nice to Sakura's best friend. _Fuck it_. She deserves no respect from him whatsoever- He felt her small hand grab a handful of hair behind his head again and heard the giggle. "…s-…Suke!" the baby happily said. "'Suke!" Surprised, his expression softened, closing his eyes as he took in the baby's beautiful voice as she said his name leaving out the 'Sa'. _Her first word was my name? _He didn't know how he felt about that.

"Hn. Think what you want." He turned his body halfway away from her. "Later." Temari wasn't letting him leave that easily. At least she didn't want him to. She knew something was up. He was acting too weird. Not to mention she caught his sour face when he was interrupted by whatever.

"Hey! We're not finished, Uchiha!" In the middle of her sentence, the girls just saw a poof of egg white from where he was standing. He was gone. "Grr… Asshole." she said through clenched teeth and anger-vein popped. Tenten kept the curious what-just-happened look.

"That was…Strange much?"

"I just know that he's hiding something urgent if he's walking around the village with a damn baby on his head. I'm finding his ass…"

"Where do you think he could've gone?"

"Ugh. Not sure. Oh well. But next time I run into that PMSing playboy I'mma confront that bitch." Tenten laughed. "What?"

"Why do you hate him so much? I've never got that about you." She smiled at Temari. Temari looked at her and smiled also, but it disappeared as she started to speak while his face popped up in her head.

"Sakura's too good for him. He's rotten." The picture of him in her head had a rotten apple thrown to it. "He's perverted." The picture exaggerated him looking at girls' butts with a smirk and hungry eyes. "He's sly." Sasuke in Temari's head had whiskers and cat ears. Let's not forget the tail swaying in the air. "And I thought I told you, Hinata, Ino, and Sakura this too, but the whole Uchiha clan is rivals with the Village Hidden in the Wind."

"Really? Oh yeah, I remember."

"Yeah. They've been rivals for a very long time now. But I was born and raised there and taught that Sasuke and his clan are dicks. _Myself_." A Flashback came in her head: **"Temari, that looks really good. I wish mine's was like that!" Her mom praised, bending over as her hands were on her knees looking at her daughter's sand castle creation. The family was at the local village's beach where most people would go for a good time, but it was just the two of them together in the family. The sky was blue, not a cloud in sight. Residents were surfing, practicing water, wind and sand jutsus in the hot area. The Village Hidden in the Wind was celebrating a victory with the Village Hidden in the Mist. Everyone was invited from various clans and villages. Temari was in a black one-piece. Her mother was also in a one-piece that was black with a short tan towel wrapped around her waist. She had blonde hair up in a bun and blue eyes. They looked exactly like sisters. Temari, sitting in the sand with her legs spread apart, looked at her work with glee. "I'm gonna go get something to drink. Want one for celebration?" her mom asked smiling. She looked up at her.**

"**Yes, please! Surprise me!" the 7-year old exclaimed.**

"**Haha, ok." the woman walked away, heading towards the consession stand. Temari leaned over to the side, looking at the side of her castle. A shadow overcame her and her creation. She closed one eye, raising one arm up to her forehead. She saw a raven-haired boy about her age looking down at her with no sign of emotion. He was wearing a black wife beater with grey trunks, his bangs covering the side of his face and forehead. Temari knew that this boy was nothing but an enemy. She frowned up at him.**

"**What do you want?" She said in a mean tone. His gaze averted to the castle.**

"**Nice castle." The boy raised his foot and stomped the sand castle, leaving it just a messed up lump of sand. A smirk played across his face as hers showed shock. She jumped up, sand all over the back of her legs, and clenched her fists by her sides.**

"**What's the big idea, you Uchiha!" She yelled angrily.**

"**Nothing." He turned his back to her. "Pitiful and poor village. People can't even make decent **_**sand castles.**_**" Rage washed over the young girl. How dare he insult her home! Was his clan even invited? He started to walk away. Not knowing what to throw at the bastard, she grabbed the sand from the destroyed castle enough to fill her hand and threw it at the Uchiha. He felt it, soft but it stung. He turned around halfway and looked at her. Not glaring, but again in his emotionless state. He then kicked sand at her, the sand like mist flying the the air on her torso. She growled madly. She whipped her head at the plastic green shovel she used to make the castle, picked it up quickly and tried to slash it across his face, only to fail. He dodged, moving his upper body slightly backward. Temari slashed and slashed the air with the boy continuously dodging, gaining no satisfaction to her anger.**

"**Heyyyyy! Temari!" someone called. It sounded like another young girl. Temari looked to her right from her rival to see her pink-haired friend running to her. The girl was wearing a pink one-piece with a flower on one of her straps. She had on black shades and a daphne sun hat made of straw with a black ribbon tied around it leaving a petite bow in the back. "Whatcha doin'?" she asked when she caught up to her friend. Temari stayed silent. Her anger hasn't subsided one bit. She turned to the boy who was looking at the Blossom. The pinknette looked back at him. "Oh, this is Sasuke-kun. He can be a butt sometimes. If he made you mad just brush it off, 'kay? He's like that with everyone." she said simply, shrugging.**

"**He… He **_**is**_** a butt."**

"**Yep! But he's a good boy." Sakura picked up her hat revealing that short pink hair with two ice cream cones on top; one chocolate and the other vanilla tilting slightly on opposite sides from eachother. "Ta-da! Want one?"**

"**Um… Sure, thanks Sakura-chan." The blonde was finally calming down, thanks to the friend. Her fists were now settled. Now that she thought about it, a refreshing treat would taste really good right about now. As she reached out to Sakura's head to claim the chocolate one, Sasuke's hand instantly claimed it first. He took his snack and took a chomp of half of the whole ice cream. Her hand frozen in its place, Temari watched him swallow in bewilderment.**

"**Hn. Sorry, did you want that one?" He teased, smirking. He placed it in her frozen hand, it barely holding it. "Here." He then took the vanilla one too, turned again, and took his leave towards the hotel.**

"**Sasuke-kun!" Sakura exclaimed, not believing what he just did. "Give that vanilla one to Temari-chan and say sorry!" She yelled after him, putting her hat back on.**

"**No." he replied, not bothering to look back. "Run-down stupid retarded low class poor fake shells and sand beach." He mumbled to himself, kicking a shell out of his path. Temari was speechless. As anger took over her once again, her fists clenched together again, the one holding the ice cream cone crushing the wafer as the ice cream plopped on the sand leaving wafer crumbs in her hand. **End Flashback.

"Ah…" Tenten said.

"Yeah…" Temari grumbled.

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Sakura just got Chidori-ed in Storm Generations. Lol.


	5. A girl knows a girl

Man, I HATE summer. x.x Wells, here's the fifth (right? .-.) Whatev's.

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In his simple but nicely spaced Uchiha house, the teen was standing by the counter, watching the baby roll back and forth on the floor happily. His brow was raised for various reasons; he didn't know what to do with her, he didn't know what to do with _himself, _he didn't know why the hell she was rolling on his floor laughing, he didn't know if she was hungry, he just DIDN'T KNOW. Thinking that she might want something to drink and sighing, he walked over to a cabinet containing cups and glass cups above him and took one. He poured Vitamin D milk into the smallest cup he picked out, enough to give her. He groaned. Is this even the right milk? He doesn't care right now. It's not like he did anyway. When he turned away from the counter to face her, she was gone. He let out a tired sigh. Great, she's gonna destroy everythi- CRASH! His eyes widened in confusion.

"Hey, where are you?" He said loud enough to go through the house but he did so lazily. Thump, thump! Faint giggle upstairs. Geez, what the hell is she doing? He walked out of the kitchen and made his way up the staircase. She better not be in his damn room, in which she wasn't. Sasuke stood at his parent's door, puzzled as ever. Fallen books, perfume bottles, DVD cases, pillows, and one or two photos were on the floor including the long dresser that was once against the wall, but that wasn't what he was looking at.

"What the he-…" Sakura was holding his parent's king-sized bed's leg with one hand. The sheets were thankfully holding on perfectly, but the pillows already fell. A happy smile was on the baby's face and laughed gleefully. She put both hands on that leg, and began banging it the floor creating a tremble and vibration in the house. Her strength was present in this form? Sasuke almost lost his balance, slightly leaning and standing on one foot to the side. He now stood, both feet on the jumping ground, forming his chakra to his feet on the floor so he could stick equally, his arms spread a bit to keep his balance, his surprised eyes on her. They flickered determination as he ran towards her in the center of the room.

"Hey, quit it already!" He yelled as he picked her up. She stopped laughing and looked at him with eye level, still holding the bed above them. He sweat-dropped. "Let it go." he demanded, glaring.

"Mm." she responded with a pout on her face frowning. She would have said no if she could speak fluently in this form, but her response was like her mouth was full, simply closed.

"Let it _go_." he enthused, narrowing his eyes slightly into her beautiful and pure jade ones.

"Mm!" She said back at the boy who messed up her fun. He remembered that she doesn't like to be told what to do. Stubborn little baby. Maybe just asking nicely would get her to let go. He growled and then sighed closing his eyelids, putting her down in front of him. His annoyed look never leaving his face, he reopened his eyes and looked at her.

"Let it go, _please_." He said, not at all in a nice tone though he tried not showing his irritated side.

"Mm!" Silence.

"I don't even care anymore." He whispered to himself, turning to the doorway. He released his chakra from sticking to the now calm floor as he walked out. Thump! The thump made him and everything else jump; not from being startled. Of course Uchihas have too much pride to be startled. He looked back at her and the turned over bed that was resting on its sheets, the headboard supporting it very little. Her legs were parted as her hands were between them pressing on the dark carpet. She returned his look with those big curious eyes.

"Hn." He turned back around and walked down the stairs passing the decorative artwork on both sides of the hallway and went into the living room.

He grabbed the remote for the flat screen 50 inch TV from the long brown couch that extended to the wall and formed a corner for the wall's corner with 7 big brown fluffy pillows on. He cut the TV on and tossed the remote back where it was, unzipping and discarding his jacket and tossing it on the arm top, revealing his well-toned abs and muscles. He fell lazily on the cusion, putting his forearm behind his head, not interested in what's on; cooking. He picked up the remote again and started flipping through channels. From cooking to some drama movie, he gave up and just went with it. The movie showed a scene where the man and woman had a make-out/sex session. Sasuke looked boredly at it. Without his concious permission, he thought about Sakura and when she would turn back to normal.

"Tsk." Why does he even care? Lately, that started to happen; thinking of her randomly. And it was really pissing him off. She has nothing that he wants and again, for the billionth time, he couldn't care less what she wants from him. In response to the dumb coincidence of her appearing in his head during a lame make-out scene, Sakura would be the last person he'd do that with, he thought, not realizing he lied to himself. Sasuke lost his virginity to some whore on a one night stand with Naruto who just desperately wanted to lose it and drag the Uchiha along with him. The sex wasn't satisfying, but Sasuke didn't expect anything from the slut. Yeah, he came for the first time, but whatever. He could have sex any time he wanted – An UCHIHA could have sex any time they wanted. It's nothing new.

Actually, when _would_ she turn back to normal?

"Mm!" He heard from a distance. He looked where the voice came. The girl probably was at the head of the steps- Thump thump thump thump thump thump thump thump! His eyes widened. Holy shit! Did she just fall down the damn steps? Sasuke put hands on the sides of him to get up, but froze when he heard the giggle. Sakura was at the foot of the steps, on her hands and knees peeping her head around the corner of the staircase only making one of her pony tails, her forehead, and eyes visible of her. If she won't cry after falling down steps then how much more can she go through? Sasuke returned his arm behind his head again and looked blankly at her.

"What do you want?"

"Mm." She was sucking on her upper lip, beginning to crawl to him, her eyes never leaving his. Once at his feet, she held his one of his capris leg with both hands and helped herself up to stand. She grabbed the edge of the cusion with one hand, the other still locked on his capris. She raised her leg up getting her heel over the edge. The baby's hand let go of the capris and gripped the cusion also beside the other hand, her leg struggling to support her. Sasuke watched in amusement at her struggle only seeing her forehead, ponytails, one foot and eyes squeezed shut her body shaking. He smirked and heard her strain a grunt. He thought about helping her up but he wanted to watch her more. After he knew she wasn't giving up anytime soon- Well, that's the girl she always will be-, he finally picked her up and placed her beside him, not close and not distant. Sakura's jade eyes still never leaving his, she just stared at his face with curiosity, in her same position; legs parted and hands in between pressing on the couch. He wasn't focused on the TV, but it held his attention. She just stared and stared at the gorgeous boy. And she wanted to play. Without warning, the young blossom looked at Sasuke's exposed nipple and pinched it, her nail slightly digging into his skin, beaming a playful smile.

"What the fuck?" he raised a brow at her, his eyes narrowing. Her moist hand was clenching his _nipple_? And then he remembered something. Sakura would sometimes pinch his nipple at the most random times. For example, he and Sakura were having a conversation with Tsunade about a mission they were about to be assigned and then she just out-of-the-blue reached over beside her and pinched him. Now that he thought about it, it's funny how it's the same nipple. Was her teenage mind still in her baby form?

"Stop, you idiot." He grabbed her wrist and tried to pull her hand away. As her hand was slowly coming off, the pinch got tighter. Sasuke's eyes flinched a bit when his nipple was finally free of her grasp, leaving it a little pink. She just giggled and climbed on top of him, stepping on the remote flipping to another channel, her feet now on either of his legs, soft small hands on his chest. The girl then started singing something, tilting her head far to the left and right following the tempo of the melody she sung, her hips doing the same; her head went right, her hip went left. All he heard was 'Lalalalaaala'. The song sounded more familiar as he turned the TV's volume down. 'Shiki no Uta'. Her favorite song. Sasuke has heard her hum or sing this song multiple times before on missions while camping out. If she was in her normal form, she would dance all around regardless of where she was. Knowing her at home, she'd have her stereos blasting and then pretending she was the singer with a brush as a microphone. But now, she was 15 years younger, doing a more G-rated version dance.

"'Suke!" she stopped her dance and looked at him with a delighted expression. He felt like smirking in return. But didn't. Knock knock knock. 'Helloooo?' a familiar female voice came from the door. 'You can't hide her forever!' Shit. Someone knows? Sasuke picked Sakura up and placed her back where she was as he stood putting his jacket back on. He looked back at her.

"Don't move. Be as quiet as a mouse, got it? Not a peep from you." he confirmed. No, she wasn't listening. She was chewing on a pillow. "_Hey._"

"Now that is _no way_ to treat your girlfriend-baby!" the feminine voice came from behind. Sasuke turned his head to face the baby's blonde best friend. She was wearing a sky blue cami with white shorts and flip-flops and her usual pony was up in a bun, hands on her hips like she was a disappointed mom.

"She's not my girlfriend." he said coldly. Which was true. "How the hell did you get in here?" He glanced at the big hole where the door once was. The sun was shining brightly in the day. Why didn't he hear that?

Ino completely ignored his question, as he watched her walk past him to the busy girl and bended over, putting her hands on her knees. "She's so cute! You don't plan on hogging her all to yourself, do you?" She raised a brow at him.

"Like I care. Get out." Ino didn't even have permission to enter an Uchiha's territory. Chicks like her would be Chidori-ed.

"You can't expect me to leave forehead baby girl!" She stood upright, her hands at her hips again facing him. "Let me keep her!"

"No." This bitch is testing his patience. Hold on. How'd she even know? Well, the only person he told was- "Naruto." he grumbled to himself.

"You don't even know how to take care of an infant!" She sniffed. "What is that smell! Are you cooking that nasty year-old fish again? Wait… You didn't even change her! Geez, how bad can you get?" The blonde picked her up and turned her best friend's butt towards her face, Sakura still holding and chewing the pillow. "Peeeee-Yew! She reeks!"

"No wonder if you're gonna put a baby's ass in your face."

She looked back at Sasuke. "I'm taking her whether you like it or not! I can take care of her so much better than you can! A girl knows what a girl wants!"

"Like hell you will."

"Like hell I won't!"

"_Get out, Ino_." He pinched his bridge. It's taking everything in him not to rip off her head.

"Hmm…," She walked to the Uchiha's couch as placed Sakura on her back and started to undo her diaper. "This girl stinks! Hey, can you throw this away for me?"

"What-GAH!" He dodged the incoming poo-filled diaper like Sakura dodged Lee's heart in the genin days.

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:D Reviews? Oh, and I won't be updating anytime soon - more like almost a month or so due to volunteering at tons of programs n ish. Sooo, mhhm. (;


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